Thursday, December 11, 2014

Be Super Sneaky...

It's a proven fact. Get a bunch of crazy kids hyped up on sugar, and silly, yet awesome things will happen. Such is the case with my family, and my devious siblings. All of what I say is true, and must be believed.

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times... I only say this because I believe I was in junior high school, which sucked for everyone... Come on, don't delude yourself, it sucked. Anyway; it was also the time when a single memory-creating movie came out. Enter the catalyst of my tale, Pearl Harbor.


This movie spurned one of the funniest memories I have. It all began with Pearl Harbor. Yes, we watched it, and yes we fast forwarded like good self sensoring pros. But the one scene that captivated the imagination me and my siblings and fellow conspirators was the scene where the nurses are telling stories on the train of how they met the main "hunk" (I say this with air quotes for appropriate sarcastic effect, which needed to be noted). All the nurses are attending to their nursly duties when one guy starts complaining about one of the vaccines the nurse is giving them, to which the nurse proclaimed the famous line;

"The government says stick'um, so we stick'um!"

Now let me set the scene. It's quiet down stairs, little does mom know an onslaught of giggles it about to explode. Upstairs in the family play-room are OUR set of family nurses. Never had our training been rougher, never had our determination been greater. We, the Todd kids were about to embark on a journey of grand sticky proportions.

I'm not sure how we procured so much of it, but we had a fist size ball of sticky tack and we were ready to use it. Small pellet sized chunks were soon created, warmed to the proper consistency in our warm hands. Then with a collective cry, we would shout our newly inspired war cry and propel our weapons into the air. They flew majestically and collided with our enemy with a series of small thuds.

They were like cannon fire to our young, silly, probably hyped on sugar hearts. Sticky tack flew as we proclaimed our catch phrase, "The government says Stick'um, So we Stick'um!" Soon the nine foot ceiling was peppered with small wads of gray sticky tack. And we in our exuberance only now were aware of our strategy failings. Our ammo spent, now stick to the ceiling, we needed a tactic to get us behind enemy lines to re-procure our arsenal of sticky tack.

A plan, a new more ingenious plan was spawned from the mind of my younger sister Kjarsti. The vacuum tube which connected the head to the handle would suit our needs perfectly. Once more we threw with glee, sticking and retreating the sticky tack, completely unaware of the doom our warfare with the ceiling was creating.

Soon footfalls we're heard on the stairs. Switzerland was no longer neutral, and was ascending onto the battlefield. Our ammo currently spent and stuck atop the ceiling we knew we had to be careful. Mom was here, and she didn't look happy. We braced ourselves, not a lip moved to utter a word, we just gazed in amazement as soft thuds began to be heard as my mother asked the question we were braced for.

"What's going on up here?"

Then Switzerland heard it, our ammo returning to the floor. Little impacts could be heard as they fell in mass. Thud, thud, thud...

The stickiness our hands had imbued into our ammo was now cooling. Thus effectively rendering our missiles volleys of attacks from the sky above.

Thud...

Thud, Thud, Thud...

We waited, worried we'd give the game away. But to our relief an explanation to the noises formed in behind my mother's eyes. Quickly she moved toward the open window and peered from it, gazing for the truth she had formed in her mind. Someone was throwing rocks against the house she had concluded.

Eager to shift the blame, we rushed to the window to look for the assailant.

"Maybe they ran off?" Suggested one of us.

"Maybe they ran around to the other side, let's go look! Said another.

Crafty delight in our childish eyes, we raced from the room, falling bits of sticky tack plummeting around us. Like triumphant warriors returning from the war, we ushered Switzerland from the room and down the stairs, away from the carnage of battle still sounding behind us.

Mom never did find out ... And to this day, it remains one of my favorite memories. The day we fought the ceiling, and the day we fooled mom into thinking some kid was throwing rocks at the house. :)

No wonder I think of the movie Pearl Harbor every time I put a poster on the wall, feeling that sticky tack roll between my fingers. Ahhh, to be young and victorious against a great and powerful enemy. An enemy such as nine foot ceilings!